I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
