you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
