Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
