One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
