dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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