my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
