Its about making memories worth repressing
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
