wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just pynch a tree in the face
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize