and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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