U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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