I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
