there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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