on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
