I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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