The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize