Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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