Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
