So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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