You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
