What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize