What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
