UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
