We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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