you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
