My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
