in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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