I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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