Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
