google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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