my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
