I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
