I wish my penis had an off switch
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
How many fucks given?
0.12846
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
