there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
My vagina just recognized that song.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
where are my pants?
in the oven.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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