she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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