Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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