I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
