I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize