I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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