my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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