I'm lost and stupid without you.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
NoShamevember. You game?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
