Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
