Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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