Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
