I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
