Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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