So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
