I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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