we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize