Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
