Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
