this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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