My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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